I'm half full, half empty.

I never thought that life would change as quickly as this. It were like days passed, and i was scanning photocopies with the hope to pass my final exams. It were only like days passed, when we were so happy and everything feels fine. It was a free life - i log in my facebook account and feel really light about everything going on with my life.

Now, you can see me with a casual attire, with a facade of a professional. You will see me going inside the office of a call center, with a greater confidence of myself. And in the wee hours of the morning, you will see me buried in the bedsheets... snoring.

This MAY be the life i want to live with - being instantly promoted three levels upward only after 3 weeks of training, being the youngest of a group of technical trainers, and will soon train future call center agents even with only 2 weeks of call center experience. This road has caused my family utmost happiness for this will soon be of big help to them.


But i don't understand why this random acts of fate has caused my life to be half full, half empty.

With the success I am experiencing at work, certain issues have been constantly striking me. It's pulling me down... and i feel demotivated everytime. I don't know if this should be the pain that is the cost of the good status i have at work. Or maybe, life really has to be pulled down when you're pushed up.

I don't know why when everything seems to work between us, things go spiral and eventually sink instantly just because of a small issue that has suddenly turned big. And because of this, i am in deepest despair everyday for an act that was not meant to be, for a forgiveness someone has to accept, and for a trust that has to be re-planted for a cause. Aside from that, i want to treated fairly, and i want to be treated the way i must be treated.

I fear i'm not seeing love anymore. I don't think someone is showing love anymore. I see acts of being mean and rude. Things have changed. I fear i might not be happy anymore. Because surely, as of this time, I am not.

Truly, not everything is constant and permanent. At the end of the day, there's only one way to go - the recesses of the silence of prayer. By then, i wish my glass is full.

Our Business-like Politics

I was doing my errands at home when i was taken aback with my little nieces (while playing the famous Plants versus Zombies in our sala) sang out their hearts with this not-so-impressive song on television: "Si Manny Villar, ang magtatapos nang ating kahirapan."

DAMN. How I've been irritated with the song for a gazillion times! ENOUGH. And i thought that life would be better if televisions automatically get "power off" when the filthy-rich, pro-poor Villar-Ad cues up. =)

But i have to face it: I was amazed at how the song captured Filipinos, most especially children like my nieces. Sadly, for me, it has turned the game of politics into an image that has most likely been taking the shape of business - and its all business.

I even found a picture of him on a seeming campaign material stuff, and yes - it really looks like a product label... and with this, you should agree:


Just as how products rise from a stage of introduction to maturity (that which is known as "the Product Life Cycle) some politicians, such as the latter, came up with a style and tactic like that of business. But is politics all that? Or if politics is all that, are we only choosing a presidential bet based on the pattern of business (that is when the most popular product rises above all else, and win the race in the market).

If there's one thing that needs to be changed in our political system, that is to make everything fair for every politico in terms of displaying themselves to the wide public. I still don't know how this could be possible, but the idea of limiting the airtime of these advertisements down could be of help to the system.

It seems that people (Filipinos, most especially) take too much action when being motivated. And when these financially advantaged politicos use their financial power to motivate people through the use of the powerful boob-tube, Filipinos are led to believe and highly encouraged. And this may lead to something more negative than expected.

Politics may be defined as "selling one's self to achieve a position", but can't we at least draw a line and not make politics a business?

Where has the gentleness gone?

I was scanning the last post i've made here, and realized that i have not blogged for a while. I was in deep slumber for writing anything for the blog... but was awakened with a strong will to really post my say regarding the disturbing hullabaloos around me. Depressingly disturbing.

Even at this very time, i still find it bizarre and hair-raising to think about how tragic the fate were for Jayfel Rayoso and Ann Rosefe Bernadette Neri who were murdered on the first quarter of the year here in Dumaguete.

I was not a close friend of the two anyway. But I remember Jayfel, my schoolmate in Immaculate Heart Academy where i studied for two years in high school. Ann Rose, in the other hand, was Ms. Dumaguete 2008, and was my acquaintance being a judge of several pageants i hosted back then... and i can still remember how she lits excitement to the program when she smiles after being introduced.

Both tragedies were saddening: Jayfel was a 2nd year mass communications student at Silliman University; Ann Rose was a Broadcast Communication student in Foundation University. But the two had also two different stories - and that's another two, long and intriguing stories.

But the two persons' fate should not be were the story centers now that they're gone... not even to the stories of their "faults" that puts the blame to the murdered people for their acts. There should be NO REASON to murder anybody even when they had committed wrong decisions.

Going back, the story should now center on these two areas: First, on how justice was sought and how fast investigations go. Second, how Dumaguete became less gentle nowadays.

The first area can be so much debatable, it can spur a number of issues interrelated to each other, and branches to another and ends up with this: No justice at all. Slow pace of investigation. Then we move to the issues of the government... and so on and blah blah blah. The second can be less debatable - it's a saddening, obvious fact. And it ends up with only one question:

"Where has Dumaguete's gentleness gone?"

Or has it really gone? Does it even still exist?

I'd like to believe Dumaguete still is. But the several murders prove me that this place is not as gentle as i'm hoping it should be. And i just... fret. Many speculate that it might be because of Dumaguete's struggle to be a progressive Visayan City - and that i bet.

There are many positive prerequisites to progress - strong economic system, good governance, massive public works - but we cannot alienate the fact that it also brings forth negative prerequisites. These negative prerequisites are now slowly occurring as i see it - more street children, more garbage, and the aforementioned, CRIMES.

Besides Jayfel's murder, three crimes have occurred in metro Dumaguete - one in Banilad Pensionne House (the murder of an alleged prostitute), one in Sibulan (The Hara Sang FU case), the shot doctor's case, the shot businessman's case, and the tear-jerking news about a 9-year old child raped in Valencia and then later helplessly beheaded.

What has justice done today to these people? Where has the gentleness gone?

These issues may only be birthpains of progress. But if these are birthpains, I'd rather stop progress be born. It isn't progress if it can't spare lives.

"Tingog": A KNN-U! TV Prduction

As promised here in the avenue, here's our collaborative output entitled "Tingog," a documentary mixed with a "man-on-the-street" style Public service announcement video. With me walking in the streets of Cebu City for the production of this output were Beverly Zena Jane Linao, my KNN comrade, and Silliman Univesity's Kapisanan ng Mass Communicators delegates Kathryne Mercado and Hana Pa-a.



"TINGOG" (Voice)
A Kabataan News Network-U! TV Production
Voice-over/Production: Kathryne Mercado
Cameraperson/Production: Joel Aba
Production Assistants/Production: Hana Pa-a, Beverlt Zena Jane Linao
Editor: Karen Seno

This video is centered on the Right of the Child to participation, the contributions of United Nations Children's Rights Convention (UNCRC) in its 20 years of existence since 1989, and whether the UNCRC's contributions, along with government's intervention, has pushed the implementation of UNCRC to higher heights at present.

We are very proud and honored to have been trained and assisted for this video, our adviser for VIDEO group and (ehem) Lifestyle Network Philippines' Executive producer Karen Seno. Bigatin! =) Thanks!

And nakakapagod na editing time and brainstorming time with Lifestyle Network Philippines' Executive Producer Ms. Karen Seno!

The pun side of political exaggeration

When the only way is to exaggerate to gain
popularity or massive votes, there's only one question to ask: